…the way parenting works. You have all these ideals, these great schemes about childcare and the things you ABSOLUTELY WON’T DO and the things you say hey, I’m OK with that. And then you find out that the things you ABSOLUTELY WON’T DO are the things that your baby ABSOLUTELY INSISTS YOU DO.

Like pacifiers. I don’t like pacifiers. I like to see babies smile! I was totally OK with using them, although I really wanted to wait until Benjamin was a bit older. Nobody ever told me that their suck reflex could sometimes be CRAZY. If I didn’t give him a pacifier sometimes he would never sleep! Luckily he is not a baby that wants the pacifier all the time. And a lot of times he’ll suck for a few minutes and spit it out. I’m grateful for that.

But the big one is co-sleeping. I’m not a big fan of co-sleeping. At all. I have my own reasons why, most of them revolving around my life being crazy right now and needing that time in bed with my husband without a baby (I’m not talking sex; I’m just talking about time to snuggle with JUST him [ok, him and sometimes Lucky]). And guess what? Benjamin won’t sleep unless he’s being held or in bed with me. I try putting him in his pack n play after getting him to sleep. 5-15 minutes later he’s awake and crying. Every time. He will sleep in his swing, but usually with his head all uncomfortably positioned, and that’s not really fair because he’s constantly being rocked. I’m not a fan of the “let them cry it out” at this phase for several reasons, but most of it being because he isn’t old enough to understand anything, certainly not that I’m just a few steps away, and I don’t want the kids neural pathways deciding that he’s been abandoned. So when CAN I let him cry it out? I’m still putting him in the pack n play every day at least once because I really don’t want to have him in bed with me… but I do want sleep.

He had two nights of absolute terror and screaming a few nights ago, and one of my coworkers recommended Dunstan’s baby language. I seriously don’t know how parents do without this DVD. It basically covers 5 “sounds” that your baby makes when he cries. They’re all relating to physical needs so the babies physical reaction is the same across the board – for instance, the noise for hunger is “neh” because they’re trying to suck and their tongue is hitting the roof of their mouth – try to say the sound, you’ll see what I mean. “Eh” means “I need to burp” and it’s like using your stomach muscles to push out air. So the third night after the two nights of screaming we watched the DVD…and found out that during his night time eating he sometimes needed to burp as many as FOUR times a feeding. Crazy stuff. But WOW did understanding his cries help!

Speaking of; he’s NEHing me. Gotta jet. The internet so far has failed me on how to get my co-sleeping baby into his own bed. Any advice is welcome!!!

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